Betrayal II-Liar, Liar Your Dicks On Fire

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So the saga of my thirty+ year marriage continues.

After being assured by my husband that he loves me and will do anything for his family I told him I needed to have completed access to his phone which he agreed to. I asked many questions including wether he had seen her or not. He assured me that he had not and that she would not have sex with him if he was with his wife…how noble of her!

Later my oldest daughter Nicole called me. She said, ” I am sending you a picture that you need to see. It is dad with her in Singapore. She put the picture up after you emailed her.” (In that email I told her she was a fool and told her that she was not the only one he was doing this with. Did she really think that she was the only one?)

B and I were taking a walk with me asking questions. I opened the photo and saw him with the Chickie. He spent four days in Singapore fucking her last January. I asked him again, “Did you see her in Singapore?”

“No”

“Really, so what is this?” I asked showing him the picture.

“I don’t know who that is”

“It is you with her in Singapore, you dick. Recognize it now?”

He went white.

“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to lose you or my family.”

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Soon another text from my daughter. Worse still…seems my husband’s sister Jo is Friends with Chickkie on Facebook. I saved her daughter’s life and that is the thanks that I get. WOW! To me, for whatever reason, that is the biggest betrayal of them all. You love her so much you are already having your sister welcome her to the family!

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More texts from my daughter. The woman has four Facebook pages all with different names. My daughter then sends her a message that says “If you keep in touch with my Dad I will send your naked picture all over the internet including on your tour company site.” (Honey, I don’t think you should do that!)

The very unfortunate thing about all this is our children found out. I was packing to leave and told my son “Dad has hurt me deeply and I need a few days to clear my head. This has nothing to do with your you, your brother or sister. Sometimes adults disappoint each other and just like you need time away from your brother I need a little time away from your father, not you.”

He turned away from me angry and wouldn’t let me touch him.

“Honey, this is not my fault. This is due to a hurt that your Dad has done.”

B jumped in. “It is all my fault. Don’t blame your mother. I did something that hurt her very much and she didn’t deserve it. I am hoping she can forgive me (yeah thanks for putting that part in…making it my fault if I don’t forgive him…that is slick!)

Remember the telephone at the beginning of all of this…this is where it gets ugly.

Before I left I went and asked to see B’s phone. He said no.

“You promised,” I replied.

He handed it over nervously. I went to messenger and saw Chickie’s sister’s Face Time at the very top so I pressed the button. He went ballistic and tried to grab the phone. I tried to keep it away from  him. He grabbed me by the arm that just got out of the sling. One thing led to another and because he was hurting me…I bit him. Over thirty years of marriage and we have never had a physical altercation in our entire lives…until now. At this point our kids walked in the front door and her us yelling about HER (they have never heard us yelling like that at each other EVER). I got the phone and went into the bathroom. My hands were shaking so hard, well, that darn IPhone jumped out of my hand and into the toilet. Now neither of us could talk to her.

“I guess if she doesn’t matter to you like you have said, you wouldn’t have cared if I called her but obviously she means more to you than I do. Tell you what your fears have all come true. Everyone knows and you have imploded our family. Now go to her. You are free.”

My son went outside and lost it and started hyperventilating and saying he couldn’t feel his legs and it went down from there into a full collapse. I spent time trying to calm him…it was the worst thing I have ever felt in my heart, ever.  Gracie wouldn’t come out from under her covers. We have a totally traumatized family.

I am sleeping at a friends house. My life is a shambles. My kids are traumatized. My husband is without a job.

Life is good…and then it is not.

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9 thoughts on “Betrayal II-Liar, Liar Your Dicks On Fire

  1. oh sweetie
    this is the most horrible thing.
    the advice I was given once, which really helped me –
    ‘you do not need to find a solution today.’
    lots of love and take care. breathe. look after you and the kids and try and be present and calm and tell them it will sort out in the best way, it will work out in the best way, it takes time.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. She doesn’t care how many women he is with because she is with many men, it’s her occupation. Get tested and then start your journey out of this cluster fuck one step at a time. Sorry this is happening to you and your family. You don’t deserve this and it’s for damn sure the children don’t.

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  3. I love how fiercely loyal your daughter is!! Thinking she’s a lot like you.

    Is Jo the sister-in-law who stopped talking to you after she and B had the conversation he wouldn’t tell you about? Very interesting if that’s the case.

    So sorry my friend.

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  4. I think you And your daughter need to focus the anger on B. Your pushing loyalty issues into his sister (I’m friends with lots of people, especially if I don’t know that they are secretly destroying lives. She may not know…) and into this woman. He is the one who has decided your vows only apply to you. That he needs to give you a list of things you have to change to stay in the marriage. That it’s ok to put your life at risk by fucking around without you knowing about it. You already have enough trauma, medical difficulty’s and stress. And if he got sacked, not laid off… I have serious guesses that there’s some #metoo backlash happening. But that’s just a guess. What a Turd. Who cares that he says he’s committed to making your family work? That was the promise the whole time and he shit all over it. The decision is yours now, he already left. When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

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      • I’m sorry dear. I am aghast when I think about people who know. The betrayal. What the fuck. I don’t think any of my friends knew about husband. There is one friend who may have known. It is so hard for me to wrap my head around it because he and I have known each other for longer than I have known husband, they met through me, but they went on several adventures over the years. They may be each other’s secret keepers. I’m so sorry. You are a beautiful force to be reckoned with. Youre amazing. You should make him leave, to make sure your kids actually have their meds. He should be uncomfortable. You should be at home.

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